Sayonara, Summer!

🎶 So long. Farewell. I bid your ass adieu. To yuh and yuh, Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh yeaaahhhhh. 🎶

<insert series of cute butt-pats and a final swift kick in the pants here> YERRR OUTTA HERE!

This is how I envision sending my kids off to school on Monday. Don’t judge.

I’m sure it won’t be exactly like that. I’ll muster a tear or three and take the obligatory back-to-school pics, but I won’t be sticking around for cutesy mommy talk on the front stepsies. Unless they’re down for a mid-morning celebratory cocktail, it’s Deuces!

Kidding.

I love my little parasites, I really do, but summer kicks my ass. I’m pretty sure my car and house feel the same way. I bet if they could drink wine we’d be best buds and laugh and laugh and laugh about how having kids wears us out and shreds our parts. We’d reminisce about getting pooped on with nary a napkin in sight on some last minute middle-of-nowhere roadie. Or having mouthwash dumped all over the floor and smudgy trails of toothpaste over vast stretches of hallway. And sing our favorite summer song “Here a camp, there a camp, everywhere a camp camp.” Ahhh, yes… the glory days of summer.  Hot, hot, infernal summer.

But I digress. I sound like a hateful whiny harpie.

I don’t hate my kids and their (500) days of summer activities, I’m happy to help them have such fun and enriching lives. I just get cranky when I neglect my one activity… my outlet… my pipe dream… MY WRITING. Momma’s gotta work, yo! Can you even call unpaid self-gratification work? It’s in the hopes of eventually being paid and gainfully employed so it counts as work, right? I’m putting in the hours now so the pay-out’s good later.

I’m just  ‘pre-employed’.

I’m building a brand.

Nursing a portfolio.

Lot’s of interest so far.

Things percolating in the distance.

There’s a check with my name on it and a Showrunner spot just around the corner.

The Emmy’s practically in the bag!

delusions meme

I do have a project to look forward to right outta the gate. Should be interesting. Come September 1st I’ll be prancer-writing right alongside Geoff LaTulippe’s The Selected Ten on their quest to finish a script in six weeks (a.k.a. #SixWeekSpec on the Twitters) and will blog about it here every week for “ownership”. At first I really stressed myself out about the thought of doing it – actually completing a legit spec in six weeks – but as I’ve calmed down over the last few days [read: rejection over not having been picked as one of the 10 has set in] I’ve decided I’m either deliriously oblivious to just how hard it will be or I’m that resolved to crush it. I’ll go with the latter for now. I’m up for the challenge… I think.

I am ready to write. That much I know for sure.

As for my little munchkins, I’m pretty sure they’re ready for school – I’m lucky in that they both love to learn. And I will absolutely get teary for my younger one. He’s my non-verbal special needs kiddo and will be starting 1st grade at a new school this year and I’m terrified for him – legitimate mommy-grade-fear terrified. The elder child, however, is on his own. Mr. Smartypants McGee kicked ass in 2nd grade so I’m sure he’ll be correcting his poor unsuspecting 3rd grade teacher in no time. I’m kidding – he’s a gem. My Star Wars-obsessed, graphic novelist-loving, future professional baseball player (we hope).

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